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              江山文学网-原创小说-优秀文学
              当前位置:江山文学网首页 >> 逝水流年 >> 短篇 >> 江山散文 >> 【流年】家(散文)

              编辑推荐 【流年】家(散文)


              作者:郁哥儿 白丁,3.70 游戏积分:0 防御:破坏: 阅读:355发表时间:2019-10-04 12:07:07

              小时候常觉得家就是妈妈温暖的怀抱和暮色下村口长长的吆喝,只要听见那一声长长的呼唤,我跑在夜色下的山路上就不会觉得害怕。渐渐长大后我觉得家是一个小小笼子,笼子外面的世界很精彩,很自在。再后来,家成了我无数次在异乡的街道,频频回头的唯一理由……
                 当我第一次离开家去到一个遥远的地方,车子越走越远,看着车窗外不断更替的风景,眼底、心中都写着好奇和期待。在一个陌生的站点停留,在陌生的人流中穿梭,抬头看天的那一瞬间,我的视线被那些在家乡从没见过的高楼遮挡。那一刻,我完全忘记了家乡连绵的山梁,只想自己化作一缕风、一粒尘,溶化进这处处棱角的钢筋水泥城池。初到一个陌生城市的我,甚至急切地想去掩盖家烙在骨子里的烙印,重重的北方口音,脸颊上的高原红……那个时候家是羞于出口怕被提及的虚荣。
                 岁月更迭中乡音渐远,起初费尽心思要一层层遮盖的高原红淡去了,言语间没有了一张口便能听出地域的口音。脱下校服换上自己认为时髦的衣裳,似乎我离某座我尽力亲近的城又近了些,我似乎完会融入了楼群下穿梭的人流。我觉得自己习惯了清晨匆匆忙忙在街边买一份早点边走边吃,方便袋已经丢进了垃圾桶却不知道食物到底是何味道的生活节奏;习惯了每天就算是在昏黄的街灯下,也要保持只露八颗牙的笑容??墒?,这一切并没有让我觉得喜悦,内心深处总有一丝丝夜深人静时才悄然涌起的惭愧。当我穿着光鲜和朋友出行或就餐,当我操着自认为标准的普通话与别人侃侃而谈,当我的脸上再也看不见那抹某个地域的标志,我发现自己心虚了。那时,家就像一根刑鞭,总能在深夜反复抽打被虚荣绑架的灵魂,让粉饰层层脱落,露出那与生俱来,被我嫌弃却又注定一生相随的印记!
                 有一次旅途中我碰到了一位老人,当车子从喧闹的南方都市开往茫茫戈壁,五十多小时的车程,老人除了睡觉几乎一直在小桌前坐着,或者在车窗前站着。他顶着一头白发,眼中始终闪着一种孩童般的期待,和我很久以后才渐渐懂得的温柔。
                 闲谈中老人告诉我,他很多年前就带着子女在广东生活,现在儿女都在广东各自安了家,现在他终于可以回自己的家了。老人很健谈,也许是因为离故土越来越近的原因,他说了许多有关他家过去的事。老人言语中透着浓浓的北方口音,让我莫名的亲切也暗暗的惭愧。起初我以为他在新疆还有家人,有房屋或者有土地。因为在我当时的意识中,家就是始终有人在等你回来,或是有个可以承载、安放疲倦的小屋??墒撬孀呕疤饧绦也胖?,他在当年呆过的偏远村落其实已经一无所有,他是带着爱人的骨灰一起回来的。何处不可埋枯骨!我当时不理解,老人千里迢迢回乡的原因。老人似乎看出我的不理解,他接下来说的一番话,让我一生铭记!多年后我才明白老人当时的心情,那是家在他心中的意义。
                 老人告诉我,“生我的地方无论多贫瘠,在我看来都是沃土,我生在那里,所以无论走多远、多久,根都在那里,所有养分都来自那里。我的爱人和我在那里相识,她让我的家变得完整,后来我们离开去广东,但是家的坐标只在北方……”那一刻我为这句简单的话语动容,也许事隔多年家在他眼中的实物,只是黄沙中一棵不死,不倒、不枯的老胡杨。但是家在他心中的意义却是不忘根生之处,不弃爱起之初。
                 随着年龄增长我开始喜欢向他人提起我的家。我家的老火炕,我家厨房上缭绕的炊烟,我家门前那连绵的山梁,我家四季呼啸的西北风,我家满脸皱纹,手指甲经常没那么干净老爸老妈,而且是以一种炫耀的姿态!
                 光阴日夜流淌,我从童年到少年再到成年,家的模样在我心里不停变化,却始终在心田的某个角落牢牢盘踞。无论少年时期不屑一顾的离去,还是成年后每次离开时的频频回头;是曾经极力想抹去的家的印记,还是深夜接通电话后听着悠远的一声“娃,你好着么……”时的泪流满面,家始终是一根线,将这些片段一一穿起。然后,如一部老电影般在脑海里不断播放,每一个镜头都紧紧抓着心头最柔软的地方。
                 儿时家是襁褓,时时紧拥着我,我总在它怀中。少年时家是被我深藏的烙印,总被我刻意地丢在身后。成年后,家是暗夜里一盏昏黄的路灯,一直在我的前方,是指引也是召唤。人生如同一个圆,我从边线的起点开始经历,只到终点和起点重合,家始终是那个圆心。
                 儿时家的概念是父母,后来家的概念是那个你想要一生相守的人,再后来就是村口那棵老槐树。
                 家,到底是什么?从儿时的依赖到少年时的羁绊,再到成年后的牵挂……不管哪一种都能触动我,不管哪一种都有让我流泪的理由,我却始终无法去定义到底什么是家。
                 如果非要细数,是不是可以说,家是一切爱的汇集点,是所有情感的中枢纽站,是世间一切善良和美好开始的地方。是母亲温暖的怀抱,高原贫瘠的黄土;是爱人深情的眼眸,孩子稚嫩的呼唤,也可以是弯曲的山路和记忆中的青瓦房屋。
                

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              【编者按】家是什么?她对于游子有着怎样的意义?作者用自己真实的体味为我们生动诠释着家的内涵。孩童时代,家是母亲温暖的怀抱以及暮色中悠长的呼唤;少年时,家是囚禁着自己的笼子,渴望挣脱束缚,去见识外面的精彩世界。青年时,家是羞于出口怕被提及的虚荣,迫不及待想抹去家在自己身上烙下的痕迹;但是,深夜时分,家,总是让自己心虚,她像一根刑鞭,反复抽打被虚荣绑架的灵魂。路遇带着爱人骨灰返回家乡的老人,他的话语让“我”对于家的意义有了更深刻的领悟。家是滋养游子的沃土,是供给你所有养分让你牵念一生的根。作者以对家的认识以及情感变化为线索,串起了对家的美好情愫,那些动人心弦的细节,总在不经意时击中读者心底的柔软之处,引发着情感的共鸣。真情佳作,推荐赏阅?!颈嗉悍缡拧?/div>

              大家来说说

              用户名:  密码:  
              1 楼        文友:风逝        2019-10-04 12:09:10
                问好作者,您对家的情感历程,让笔者感同身受。
                 祝福您,佳作不断!
              心有多大,舞台就有多大。
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